Social Icons

Pages

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #10

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

No matter how much I try, this list is endless, many people have come up with many different opinions and one liners, and because of the internet, we can have a look at what they think.

You can also comment on this series below in the comment box, and provide your reviews, jokes, and thoughts. 


Check out other funny answers at the below mentioned links:

http://www.theunrealtimes.com/2012/10/21/why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road/

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Why_did_the_chicken_cross_the_road

http://www.chickenjoke.com/

http://philosophy.eserver.org/chicken.txt

http://www.gapagap.com/blog/why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road/271/

http://fullhydblogs.com/discussions/viewtopic.php?f=21&t=23956

http://www.debatepolicy.com/showthread.php?34171-Why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road

http://boyscouttrail.com/content/joke/why_did_the_chicken_cross_the_road-851.asp

http://stat.fsu.edu/~chicken/webfiles/q.html

http://stat.fsu.edu/~chicken/webfiles/pc.html

http://kiwi.emse.fr/JJG/chicken.html

http://www.gerryhemingway.com/chicken.html


Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #9

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

"Why did the chicken cross the road?..."



Answers to this famous question by some political minds, and other people...
Here Goes:

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?


"But there is No Road" - Kapil Sibal 

"I Never Laid out Any Road for Anyone to Cross" - Kamal Nath 

"Hamari parteeeee....aam murgeeee ki parteeeee hain" - Italian waitress

"The chickon cross the road on 24 may at 6 pm...we're no longer accountable as now it is 27 May" - Pranab Mukherjee

"Genuine Chicken error" - P. Chidambaram

"But sources within the congress say that the chicken did follow the rules...the PM was misled" - Barkha Dutt

"But who hid the chicken from the Prime Minister?" - Nidhi Razdan

"Many chicken have been run over by trucks. I saw the bones" - Rahul Gandhi 

"Chicken died while crossing the road.. It called and told me RSS did it" - Diggy

"We give a clean chick...errr....chit to the chicken" - CBI

"Rahul has been misquoted and quoted out of context by the media in this chicken issue" - Jayanthi Natarajan

"On Face the Nation tonight: Do chicken have a right to cross the road when the roads are so mismanaged" - Sagarika

"Wish there is a day when special roads are built for chicken to exercise their freedom. Till then Goodnight" - Rajdeep

"Our govt is taking strong steps to protect chicken by closing down roads. BJP is anti-chicken by building roads" - Manish Tewari

"Dead chicken will file affidavit in court " - Jethmalani

NEXT


[Source: Facebook-United India ]

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #8

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

Views and answers of some people amongst other Indian personalities.
Check 'em out below:

#Laloo: Because BJP on this side. And because somebody stole chicken fodder. This is scandal. He is looking that side for his fodder. I did not take it.

#Kalaam: I will ask u a counter question. Will u answer? Tell me! Tell me now!

#Ekta Kapoor: It's daughter in law lives on the other side. So she is going to make amends. Saas bhi kabhie bahu thi...

#Advani: It is an example of Muslim appeasement. The congress is on the other side tempting that muslim chicken with special favours.

#Buddhadeb Bhattacharya: Just because that chicken crossed the road the CPI(M) cadre cannot be blamed

#Maneka Gandhi: That chicken has been forced to cross unescorted. It is a violation of animal rights


#BCCI: We have issued a show cause notice. No chicken can cross without the board's permission

#Agarkar: I still hold the record for the maximum ducks in a row. One chicken does not make a difference

#Siddhu: If we don't prevent and prepare. We will repent and repair. That chicken is an example to us all. He is showing initiative! He maybe angry but he is not cross. He may cross but he is the boss. He....

#Arjun Singh: We must have reservation. Between 9 am to 5 pm only SC/ST and OBC chickens can cross

#Rakhi Sawant: I don't know but i did not kiss that chicken

#Karan Johar: He came to collect this lovely hamper. When people win it on my show. Kuch kuch hota hai.  Since its a chick you can't say I'm gay anymore...

#Mufti Mohammed Sayeed (Ex CM J&K): See there is no army presence on the other side.

#Mirwaiz Umar Farooq: He was simply protesting for an independent Kashmir. We have to give kashmiri chickens more freedom. Indian governments attitude has always been 'Ghar ke murghi dal barabar!'

#Pranab Mukherjee (when he was Foreign Minister): It shows the presence of a foreign hand. That chicken was a Pakistani infiltrator. There are training camps on the other side

#Rahul Gandhi: If that chicken was a Gandhi it would not have crossed.

#Sachin Tendulkar: 17 years I have sacrificed for this game. I have never been accused of having a bad attitude. I have never been accused of crossing with a chicken.

#Greg Chappell (Chappal): The seniors have formed a mafia and forced that chicken to cross.

NEXT


[Source: http://creative.sulekha.com/why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road-indian-version_36266_blog ]

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #7

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

This one is dedicated to all the science buffs out there. Actually it is for everyone to read!
Why the partiality you say? Well, mostly because many may not understand the jokes unless you have studied them. So...

Here, famous scientists and researchers answer the question:
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"


Well, here goes:
  1. Albert Einstein: The chicken did not cross the road. The road passed beneath the chicken.
  2. Isaac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross roads.
  3. Wolfgang Pauli: There was already a chicken on this side of the road.
  4. Carl Sagan: There are billions and billions of such chickens, crossing roads just like this one, all across the universe. [Apologies for perpetuating the misquote.]
  5. Jean-Dernard-Leon Foucault: What’s interesting is that if you wait a few hours, it will be crossing the road a few inches back that way.
  6. Robert Van de Graaf: Hey, doesn’t it look funny with all its feathers sticking up like that?
  7. Albert Michelson and Edward Morley: Our experiment was a failure. We could not detect the road.
  8. Ludwig Boltzmann: If you have enough chickens, it is a near certainty that one of them will cross the road.
  9. Johannes van der Waals: Some say it was a sixth sense that led the chicken to cross the road. I say it was a sixth power.
  10. David Hilbert: I was standing on the side of the road and a chicken came along, evidently in some kind of strange state. I informed it that it was nevertheless still in my space, so it went across the road.
  11. Blaise Pascal: The chicken felt pressure on this side of the road. However, when it arrived on the other side it still felt the same pressure.
  12. John David Jackson: You’ll find out after you complete this 37-page calculation.
  13. Henri Poincare: Let’s try changing the initial position of the chicken just a tiny, tiny, tiny bit, and….look, it’s now across the road!
  14. Enrico Fermi: In estimating to the nearest power of 10 the number of chickens that cross the road, note that since fractional chickens are not allowed, the desired power must be at least zero. Therefore, at least one chicken crosses the road.
  15. Werner Heisenberg: Because I made darn sure it was standing right next to me on this side.
  16. Richard Feynman, 1: It’s all quite clear from this simple little diagram of a circle with lines poking out of it.
  17. Richard Feynman, 2: There was this good-looking rooster on the other side of the road, and he figured he’d skip all the games and just get to the point. So he asked the chicken if she’d like to come over to his side, and she said sure.
  18. Erwin Schrodinger: The chicken doesn’t cross the road. Rather, it exists simultaneously on both sides…..just don’t peek.
  19. Charles Coulomb: The chicken found a similar chicken on this side of the road to be repellent.
  20. John Bell: Since there are no local hidden chickens, any hidden chickens you find must have come from far away. They therefore surely must have crossed at least one road on their way here.
  21. Henry Cavendish: My dear chicken, I have calculated with the utmost detail and precision the density of your insides. Now, for the sake of my precious sanity, I beg you, stop that incessant clucking and be gone!
  22. Arthur Compton: There were a bunch of chickens waving at me on this side of the road, but then a car came along and they all scattered to the other side. The funny thing is that the ones that ended farthest away were still waving at me a few minutes later. So apparently, the ones that scattered the most had the longest waves.
  23. Hans Geiger: I don’t know, but I say we count how many times it crosses!
  24. Howard Georgi: It can cross all it wants, but I’m going to sit here and wait until it decays.
  25. Edward Teller: I will build a more powerful chicken, and it will cross the road with more energy than any chicken before!
  26. Oskar Klein: Actually, it can get to the other side of the road without crossing it.
  27. Satyendra Bose: An identical chicken already crossed the road, so this one was much more likely to do the same.
  28. Wallace Clement Sabine: If you listen very carefully, you can hear the pitter patter of chicken feet, which implies that a chicken must be crossing the road.
  29. Sir David Brewster: Let me give you my angle on this….
  30. Galileo Galilei: The chicken crossed the road because it put one foot in front of the other and took a sufficient number of steps to traverse a distance greater than or equal to the road’s width. Note that the reason is not because the earth is the center of the universe. Oh, great… another jail term.
  31. David Gross, H. David Politzer, Frank Wilczek: The road is not wide. And at short distances a chicken is free to do whatever it wants.
  32. Robert Millikan: It didn't. It made it part way and then just sort of hovered there, apparently feeling an equal pull in both directions.
  33. Peter Higgs: We must first find the chicken.
  34. Nicolaus Copernicus: The chicken was moving at a slightly different orbital speed around the sun.
  35. Fusion researchers: Because it knew that in 30 years it would get to the other side. [No insult intended here. Well, at least not to the physicists working hard with the meager funds they've been given.]
  36. George Francis FitzGerald: It had its doubts, but after starting across the road, the chicken observed that the distance to the other side didn’t seem quite as large, so it figured it would continue on.
  37. Leo Szilard: First one chicken crossed. This then caused a few more to cross, each of which in turn caused a few more…
  38. George Atwood: The chicken wanted to introduce a setup that would enable it to pose a question and thereby torture future students over and over and over...
  39. Johannes Kepler: I don't know. But I'm glad it did, because as it waddled across, it was kind enough to sweep the area of the road with its wings. And it did so at an astonishingly consistent rate.
  40. Robert Pound and Glen Rebka: It was out for a morning jog and wanted to get its heart rate up by crossing over the crown of the road.
  41. Robert Hooke: At first, the chicken was drawn across the road. But after passing the middle, it felt an increasing desire to return to the original side. It did end up making it to the other side (just barely), but then decided to return. I believe it is still going back and forth on this.
  42. Lisa Randall: The only thing about the chicken we ever discuss is why it crossed the road. There are many more dimensions to it than that!
  43. Norman Ramsey: I don’t know why, but I do know that it took 4.71988362706153 seconds to get there.
  44. Pierre de Fermat: Forget about why. I’ll show you how it can get there in the least amount of time.
  45. Neils Bohr: In attempting to answer the question by observing the chicken, I collapsed its wavefunction to the other side.
  46. Gustav Kirchhoff: It actually crossed the road twice, due to a strange desire to form a closed loop.
  47. Louis de Broglie: Interesting, it always seems to flap its wings an integral number of times before it comes back.
  48. Michael Faraday: No, again? How many times do I have to tell it to stick to the safety of its cage?!
  49. Max Planck: It appears to be a white chicken. Sorry, I deal only with black bodies.
  50. Sir William Hamilton: With regard to the issue of crossing the road, the chicken made it to the other side by taking as little action as possible.
  51. Hugh Everett: I don’t know, but there’s another one over there that isn’t crossing the road.
  52. Edward Witten: 50 years ago, you probably would have said there was no hope of answering this question either.
  53. Archimedes: I was running through the streets yelling and screaming, and it was only afterward that I realized I was carrying a chicken.
  54. Amadeo Avogadro: What, just one? I deal only with very large chicken numbers.
  55. Ptolemy: Someone will probably think of a simpler explanation in a few thousand years, but the present understanding is that the chicken crosses the road because it is constrained to move on this here sphere, which in turn has its center on this one over here. The end result is that, except in the rare case of retrograde chicken motion, the chicken does indeed cross the road.
  56. Marie Curie: Good question. And one that is much less hazardous to one’s health.
  57. Willebrod Snell: I’m not sure, but I did notice that when it stepped onto the road, it changed its direction.
  58. Johann Carl Friedrich Gauss: Draw a pillbox around the road, and consider the flux of chickens through the box. If a chicken leaves this side of the road, then assuming that there are no chicken sinks or sources, it must end up on the other side.
  59. Johann Balmer: Why are there only two lines in the middle of the road?
  60. James Clerk Maxwell: Ok, Miss Chicken, let’s figure this out together. Hold out your right foot…. yes, that’s it…. good…. now curl your talons…. right…. now look at your…. hold on – you don’t have any thumbs!
  61. Osborne Reynolds: No idea. But I can see from the ruffled feathers that this was turbulent chicken flow.
  62. Karl Schwarzschild: The sad thing is, I know I could have answered this question too. [This one isn’t meant to be funny.]
  63. Christian Doppler: It always sounds a bit down when it’s heading over there, but rather upbeat when it’s coming back.
  64. Edwin Hubble: Strange, it seems to move faster the farther away it gets.
  65. Ernest Rutherford: The differential cross section for forward chicken scattering is quite large, so the chicken will most likely cross the road if it was initially heading in that direction.
  66. Lene Hau: Well, I wish it hadn't. It cut right in front of me while I was out for a bike ride, chatting it up with a photon.
  67. Stephen Hawking: Chicken fluctuations will inevitably create a scenario where a chicken ends up on the other side of the yellow line, in which case there is a nonzero probability that it will escape to the other side.
  68. Lord Kelvin: I don’t know. But I think the road actually starts back there a bit.
  69. Daniel Bernoulli: Because it enjoyed flying to the other side. Ok, wait, can someone tell me once and for all if I’m relevant to all this flying stuff or not?!
  70. Robert Oppenheimer: Although it was deemed appropriate at the time, people will forever question whether it was correct for the chicken to cross the road.
NEXT


 [Source: http://www.physics.harvard.edu/academics/undergrad/chickenroad.html ]

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #6

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

I just found out these answers by some famous people as well, that quite accurately point out the answers to the most important question in the history of mankind:

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"


Answers are as follows:

*KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

*PLATO: For the greater good.

*ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

*KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.


*TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.

*SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

*RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

*CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

*HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

*LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken `crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.

*MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

*MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, ``Thou shalt cross the road.'' And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

*FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?

*RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

*MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

*JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?

*FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

*BILL GATES: Our soon-to-be-released Chicken '98 will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

*OLIVER STONE: The question is not, ``Why did the chicken cross the road?'' Rather, it is, ``Who was crossing the road at the sametime, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?''

*DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

*EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

*BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

*RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road... it transcended it.

*ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

*MICHAEL SCHUMACHER: It was an instinctive maneuver, the chicken obviously didn't see the road until he had already started to cross.

*COLONEL SANDERS (Famed for Kentucky Fried Chicken): I missed one?

*PHYSICIST: Because the chicken's momentum had a positive component towards the other side of the road.

*QUANTUM PHYSICIST: Because you measured its momentum too precisely.

*MATHEMATICIAN: Because of the intermediate values theorem.

*ALGEBRAIC GEOMETRIST: Well, consider a faithfully flat etale coherent sheaf...

*C PROGRAMMER: cross_road() was called from get_other_side()

*C++ PROGRAMMER: chicken->CrossRoad() was called from chicken->GetOtherSide()

*RMS: The licenses for most roads are designed to take away your chicken's freedom to cross it. By contrast, the GALLUS Road Public Licence...

*GARY LARSON: ``THE OTHER SIDE - Why do you need a reason?''

*ENS STUDENT: Contretest.

*OMAR KHAYYÁM:
   I sent my Chicken across the Road,
   Some Letter of that Other-side to download:
   And by and by my Chicken return'd to me,
   And answer'd ``I Myself am Princess and Toad:''

*MARKETING DIVISION OF MICROSOFT CORPORATION: Where does your chicken want to go   today?

*MARVIN: The other side is just as dull as this one. Don't talk to me about chickens.

*ARTHUR DENT: Why did the chicken cross the road? 42? No, that doesn't make sense.

*GOETHE: Es irrt das Huhn, solang es die Straße übergeht.

*HARI SELDON: It's part of the Plan.

*HAMLET:
  To cross, or not to cross, that is the question: -
  Whether 'tis nobler in the mind, to suffer
  The slings and arrows of outrageous side;
  Or to take arms against a road of troubles,
  And by crossing end them?

*THERMODYNAMIST: Because the pressure of chickens was greater on this side of the road, and the chicken's crossing made the entropy greater.

*ANDERSEN CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting ,in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

NEXT


[Source: http://www.madore.org/~david/misc/chicken.html ]

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #5

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

Seriously, if you ask me, I never thought this series would last anymore than a single post.
However already 4 articles have been posted by me previously - and it never gets tiring.
Continuing with the answers to the most important question for the entire mankind...

Here goes:

The Star Trek version:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
  • Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before!
  • Spock: At the time, it seemed the logical thing to do.
  • McCoy: Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a barnyard psychologist!
  • Scotty: Because the engines couldna take it any more!
  • Computer: Insufficient data.
  • Android, typical: I am not programmed to respond in that area.

Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A: Because he had no body to go with.

Q: Why did the horse cross the road?
A: To reach  his Nay-borhood.

Q: Why did the dog cross the road?
A: To get to the barking lot.

Q: Why did the stoner cross the road?
A: Who else would follow a chicken?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because the Armadillo told him it was safe

Q: Why did the chicken stop crossing the road ?
A: It got tired of everyone making so many jokes !!!


NEXT

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Friday, February 15, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #4

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

Continuing the series. Welcome to the fourth edition of this epic riddle....

Here goes:

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It wanted to be famous.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It wanted to show it was not a chicken.


Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he thought if a zebra could do it, so could he.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: I could tell you, but then the Chicken Mafia would kill me.

Q: Why did the otter cross the road?
A: To get to the otter side

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because he wanted to...

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: Because it wanted to cause a controversy as to why it crossed the road. 

NEXT

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #3

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

The mayhem continues in this third installment of the 'Chicken crossing the road' mystery...

Check it out:

Q: Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?
A: She wanted to stretch her legs.

Q: Why did Captain Hook cross the road?
A: To get to the second hand store

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Give me ten minutes with that chicken and we'll find out.

Q: Why did the cactus cross the road?
A: Because it was stuck to the chicken

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
 -   Who said it crossed the road at all?

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because chickens hadn't evolved yet

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Dinosaurs are extinct, silly!

Q: Why did the Spy cross the road?
A: Because he was never really on your side

Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A: You ate it!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: No-one knows, but the road sure was pissed.

NEXT

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #2

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

Welcome to the third installment of this series. Hope you enjoyed the previous edition.

Here it is:

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: The coyote had put a sign over there, saying "Bird Seed."

Q: Why did Douglas R. Hofstadter cross the road?
A: So that I could ask this question.

Q: Why did the cow cross the road ?
A: To get to the udder side

Q: Why did the cow cross the road ?
A: To go to the moooooovies!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: For fowl purposes


Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because shut the hell up, that's why.

Q: Why does anything cross the road?
A: To get to the other side.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It had already crossed the road 999 times that day and wanted to make it 1000.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A: Because she was a double-crosser.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud and cross the road again?
A: Because he was a dirty double-crosser

Q: Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road?
A: Because he didn't have enough guts

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It thought it was an eggs-elent idea!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because it was a chicken!

NEXT

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road? #1

-:VB:-

PREVIOUS

The post begins here. Prepare to be amazed, humored, surprised, and dumbfounded.... ;)

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the other side

Q: Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
A: She was afraid someone would Caesar!

Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: To cockadoodle dooo something

Q: Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
A: He heard the referee calling fowls


Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: To prove he wasn't chicken

Q: Why did the playground cross the road?
A: To get to the other slide

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because I'm Batman!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: None of your damn business

Q: Why did the horse cross the road?
A: Because the chicken needed a day off

Q: Why did the squirrel cross the road?
A: Because he was stapled to a chicken

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To show the possum it could be done.

Q: Why did the abstract surrealist cross the road?
A: Tomato monkey.

Q: Why did the ocean cross the shore?
A: To get to the other tide.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To show the blonde how!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because he freakin' felt like it!

Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: Because he wasn't a chicken

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because it wanted to find out what those jokes were about.

NEXT

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #0

-:VB:-

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

This is perhaps the oldest amongst the riddles, or puzzles or jokes -  whatever you might want to call it.
Actually answer to this question is:
"Because it wanted to get to the other side"

Yup! It is as simple as this. Nothing scientific, no deduction, no hypothesis - just a plain and simple answer. It is logical though, wouldn't you agree?

Still, this question always brings out the best answers from deep within your funny bone. Everyone has an answer to this question, be it funny, silly, lame or scientific. Whatever be the approach, it keeps you occupied everytime, and makes you think.

Well, for once even I agree that chickens should be royalty for these jokes, as these are made at their expense. After two of the most famous questions are based on chickens themselves.
One being the mentioned one, and the other being: 'What came first - the chicken or the egg?'
Isn't it?

As weird as it may sound, but it's true - the internet is filled with loads of jokes. I have collected and compiled many good ones. I am composing some of my own and it will take time to complete, but I'll save that for later. till then, I hope you enjoy, reading this series of posts.

Your comments and ideas would be appreciated.
If you have any other jokes related to this topic, you can surely post them in the comments section.

Next


Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Optical illusions #2

-:VB:-












Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...



Friday, February 1, 2013

One liners - Feb. 2013

-:VB:-

One liners for this month:

Here Goes:

1. Ninety-nine percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

2. Borrow money from a pessimist -- they don't expect it back.

3. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

Read more at: http://www.caclubindia.com/forum/funny-one-liners-unlimited-stock--104568.asp
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

Read more at: http://www.caclubindia.com/forum/funny-one-liners-unlimited-stock--104568.asp

4. Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

5. I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

6. Never answer an anonymous letter.

7. It's lonely at the top; but you do eat better.

8. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

9. Always go to other people's funerals, or they won't go to yours.

10. Few women admit their age; few men act it.

11. If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made with meat?

12. No one is listening until you make a mistake.

13. Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

14. We have enough youth. How about a fountain of "Smart"?

15. He who laughs last thinks slowest.

16. Campers: Nature's way of feeding mosquitoes.

17. Always remember that you are unique; just like everyone else.

18. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

19. There are three kinds of people: Those who can count and those who can't.

20. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?

21. Friends may come and go, but enemies tend to accumulate

22. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.

23. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

24. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

25. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.



[Source 1 ] [Source 2]

Thanks for reading, and do tell me if my posts are Wise or Wicked...

©All Copyrights Reserved.