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Sunday, September 19, 2010

Oh those daily soaps #2


So, due to public demands, I have edited and re-edited most of This post, and I will continue posting it in forms of additions (#1, #2, .. and so on)

Here I am, back with another mind boggler for y'all... the second addition to "Oh those daily soaps".

I, somehow seem to have mastered and understood the logic behind making these serials.
So, if you wanna try your hand at serials, here are your lessons:

Lesson#01: Start with a very very rich joint family, having a big bungalow, big company, different cars for everyone, few small kids, ek kunwari aur sabki ladli beti [only she should have the brains], saas, bahus, bhabhi, devarani, jethani, naukrani, etc. etc.

#02: The old ones should be there, NEVER kill them in the serial, even if everyone else dies, or they create a world record due to their everlasting age, NEVER do it...

#03: All the ladies should bitch, plot, plan, talk, yell, shout, scream, against and at each other.

#04: The show can start with a love story, a bachelor and a girl - or a girl searching for her prince,or the boy of her dreams - the favourite in her family, sabki ladli dulaari and all that - and then eventually marry her off.

#05: The Bahu, should be the dumbest of all the characters, ideal, sanskari, parampara se bhari hui, should spend her entire day cooking food for everyone, giving tea, performing aartis and pooja in the temple, being loved by her in-laws, giving out free advice, giving hours and hours of nonstop pravachan and lecturing to someone who doesn't give a damn, etc...

#06: She should also be compatible with using glycerine[for crying] as she would have to cry her eyes off in just about every 10 minutes, by blaming god, kismat, and herself.

#07: She should leave the house and the family for at least once and go away, so that everyone in the house gets a chance at using glycerine.

#08:  She has to want to start going to the office to be a part of the family business because she wants to stand on her own feet. This way, even if she hasn't studied, or doesn't even know about the 'B' in business, or if she is illiterate, she manages to take the company to greater heights, a feat which - the elders, her co-bahus, her husband, who are experts in these fields with gigantic experiences and giant degrees have failed to achieve even after spending tonnes of money.

#09:  All the gents in the family should have at-least 'Ek najayaz aulad', about which none of the family members knew about.

#10: A vamp is a must, even though she is smart, sexy, beautiful, and having a brain - the sole purpose to fit her in is to insult her to a point where she becomes a villain, which gives an opportunity to stretch the show further ahead.

The next addition is on its way...
Till then , keep reading...

Do tell me if my posts are "Wise or Wicked"....
VB signing out.......

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